Day #4:Keeping in touch: Regret of the dying.

One of the top 5 regrets of the dying according to Bronnie Ware’s book Top Five Regrets of the Dying and blog  Inspiration and Chai, was: ‘I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends’.

According to Bronnie an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care, caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives, among such regrets as: I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard, I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings, I wish that I had let myself be happier, most people wish they had taken more time to appreciate their friends. She says,

‘It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love’.

In today’s fast-moving world of machine communication, even with the myriads of communication tools we have at our disposal,we have never been more disconnected.It’s true we are busy.I myself am guilty of this.However, taking time to occasionally check in with the people who mean alot to us can be our biggest investment.

A simple approach I use occasionally is to write a genuine, heart-felt message to a friend or even call letting them know even though I am really busy, I still think of them. Especially those friends who are far away in another country or continent.

More importantly, when we get a chance to be with our friends, keeping away all communication devices and controlling our temptation to constantly check our phones for the latest Facebook updates,tweets or even emails and giving the person 100% attention can be the best gift we can ever give someone.

What’s your own way of keeping in touch with friends you don’t see all the time? Please share in the comments.

2 thoughts on “Day #4:Keeping in touch: Regret of the dying.

  1. Wonderful write up.. Quite timely.. i just stumbled upon it..
    I would say, its indeed very true that admist our busy schedule, we should always find time for those who mean so much to us. but what if what you feel is the best of your time isn’t up to what your friends expect of you?
    I try to keep in touch but.. but I end up giving excuses as to why i didn’t keep in touch. i’m tired of giving excuses, What do you think is the way out?


  2. Dear Sekinah, I am sorry I am just replying to your comment now. Very interesting point of view you raised there. I still find myself not meeting up to people’s expectation of how frequent and well I keep in touch. Well, for me, I started making a list of people I need to write a note to occasionally say one in a week or once in a month depending on how close the person is to me. For others even if I dont keep in touch with them for a very long time, I try to write them specially in occasions such as their birthday. I found this really helps.


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